Hallo, my name is Herbie and this is my diary. Why a diary you may ask, well, people have become famous writing diaries, there was Samuel Pepys, Anne Frank and Adrian Mole to name but a few. Adrian Mole is my hero so my diary will be more like Adrian’s than the more erudite Samuel Pepys. In common with Adrian I shall relate life as I see it with just the right touch of humour and sarcasm that he became so well known for.
My diary was inspired by my mom’s friend, Warren, who told her she needed to find some new interests now she has retired, so I thought she would enjoy reading about life from a dog’s point of view.
You may ask, why the diary of a SAFFA dog? Well for those of you not familiar with the term it means ” South African Far From Africa” and that is what I am!
I was born in Deneysville, which is in the Free State in South Africa (we used to call it the Orange Free State, I can never understand the need to keep changing place names it is very confusing).
I am a chocolate Labrador, well at least I was until my mom decided that shaving me was a good thing to do, admittedly it is cooler in the heat of a Queensland summer, but it has come at a cost for me as I am now a mottled chocolate, beige and very nasty light brown colour. Sometimes I wonder about the decisions my mother makes on my behalf, she tells me mottled is all the rage these days and I confess when I look at her barnet I see that indeed I am quite in fashion.
Anyhoo moving forwards, my very early years were spent in Johannesburg as part of a very large extended family of people and dogs; then one day our mother packed us up and sent us to the kennels.
At first I thought it was just another one of her extended holidays, wow that was a mistake of note, three of us were incarcerated for 7 MONTHS so that we could prove to Australia that we were no threat to Border Security.
Sadly my big brother and sister went to doggy heaven not long after we arrived in Australia, this made me very miserable indeed and my mom said it would be good for me to have a younger brother. So Barney, the Bogan from Beaudesert came into my life. He was quite an aggravating creature in the early days, constantly hassling me to play his silly puppy games, but I have realised as time has passed that he always has my back and in fact is quite a cool dude overall.
Moving forwards again…I had just got Barney under some sort of control when my mom sat us down one night and told us about a blonde girl who was very sad as she had lost her mummy and daddy and needed someone to look after her.
Not again, I thought..how many more is she going to bring into the house! Then a vision of loveliness appeared one day in the form of Bella Bumpkin. (Here I am in danger of comparing myself to Adrian Mole and his hopeless love for the gorgeous Pandora!)
I am besotted without a doubt, my mom refers to her as “The Princess” and that is what she is, gracious and gentle with exquisite manners.
This is as good a time as any to tell you that my eyesight is pretty poor, almost non existent even, but as I told my mom, sight is only the third most important thing to us canines after smell and sound. I was complimented at the dog park yesterday for my ability to chase the girls around the park without running into anything or anybody..easy peasey peeps. You get a lot of sympathy and tons of treats in the dog park thanks to my incredible ability to smell out anyone with dog treats hidden anywhere on their person!
Its been a busy day so I will sign off now, with a few pictures of myself so you can all see what I look like. Maybe I will throw in a couple of my family as well as they will be major players in my diary stories, or maybe I will leave that for another day, sleep calls!
As a SAFFA dog I will leave you with a few words of African Wisdom to see you through the night hours.
“Mothers are there to grasp the inexplicable, we are there to light up the darkness. We are there to cosset when the lightning strikes and streaks across the night sky, when the thunder shakes the ground, when the mud slides and swallows. We are there to love without beginning or end” (Mariama Ba)