Thursday 1st August

Dear Diary,

What a day! Candles and incense have been burning since 5 am, I am told, to get rid of the smell of dog! Well, I ask you, who’s fault is it that we smell when we only go to the Parlour for a wash on a quarterly basis. I might add if the hairbrush came out more frequently then our hair also wouldn’t be clogging up the vacuum.

The robot vac has been scurrying around like a demented dervish on the upper floor and his big sister has been rushed around down below.  By 8.45 we were pronounced as being “ready”.  I must say that I am quite impressed by what the woman can achieve when she really puts her mind to it, I dared to offer congratulations, but I fear rather spoiled the moment by suggesting that if she performed like this on a daily basis we could be living in a pristine palace instead of a grubby hovel. It appears that she did not like my “hovel” reference! Bella suggested a little more diplomacy in the future as after all we are rather dependent on her continuing hospitality.

Bridge came and went, with the usual amount of chitter chatter and somewhat hysterical laughter. My mate Casper would be horrified to hear that his mother had recounted the tale of his most unfortunate accident of peeing himself whilst asleep, a story which attracted some silly giggling. They all sit around that small table like a Coven of Witches discussing what spell they will cast next!

Mother went to the hairdresser in the afternoon, leaving us all to sleep of the morning’s excitement.  She arrived back as evening fell and pronounced that it was too late to go to the dog park.  Her excuse was weak I thought, but she softened the blow by reminding us of our play date with Sid and Cookie at Musgrave Park in the morning. This is also to be a photo shoot I have been informed, the topic being “Outdoor Action Photos” (sighs heavily).

I have just been told that Mother has yet another social event in her calendar for the day, another Hen affair down at Nobby’s Beach; does she never get tired of this social butterfly behaviour?

She has been reading today about how bad dog pellets are for our health so is now committed to making our food for us on a daily basis. I wonder how long that will last, but thankfully I see there is an emergency bag of rations sitting in the pantry.

Night all, sleep beckons….

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