Diary of a SAFFA Dog – Tuesday 13th August

Another quiet start to the day.  Mother went off early for a trip to somewhere called IKEA, where it appears vast amounts of money can be spent on things we do not need.

She went off with Piper’s mom, in search they said of ‘a packet of serviettes’.  That was a pretty thin excuse for what turned out to be a marathon shopping expedition.  I understand that they have to return again in the morning as all the purchases could not be fitted into one car!

I reminded Mother than we were supposed to be on an economy drive and was told, rather brusquely I thought, that we were only economising on food!  I can only hope that we have a bottomless freezer if this spending spree continues.

A labrador, dubbed Murphy, was also purchased from IKEA.  I was a little concerned by his appearance and muttered under my breath that no discussion had taken place  about another mouth to feed. I felt it to be particularly thoughtless in light of the current economy drive.

Before I had worked myself up into a real lather about this, Bella explained to me that this particular labrador would not require food as it was in fact a large stuffed toy. My blindness was not accepted as an excuse and they all had a good laugh at my expense.

Barney, who as we all know is not the brightest of souls, has been playing with it upstairs.  I warned him to be careful as removal of any body parts would bring the wrath of ‘Her Who Must Be Obeyed’ down on his head.

I did get my own back on Bella a bit later.  She was peering at herself in the mirror and asked to the world at large ‘Do you think I am fat?’.  Before I got the chance to say ‘No, not at all’, Barney sniggered and said ‘You look like a giant sheep.’  She was, understandably, quite upset by this remark. Bearing in mind her joke over the stuffed toy, I thought it too good an opportunity to miss and suggested to her that if she moved around more at the dog park instead of sitting around with a snooty expression on her face, then maybe her waistline might show some improvement.  She sulked for most of the morning and could not even be persuaded to look at my pictures of Africa.

We went off early to the dog park as Mother is going to the Thai restaurant for supper.  I said that I thought there was no money for food, she said this is different and refused further explanation.  I dared to ask her to bring us back some coconut rice, something we are all particularly fond off, but this request was met with some derision!

The dog park was about as boring as it gets being devoid of anyone at all.  It was far too early for all the regulars.  It was an extreme disappointment and to my mind the waste of an outing.  Mother, however, has ticked the ‘walkies’ box for the day and told us to be grateful for what we were given.

We had a near accident on the way home as Mother was multi-tasking whilst driving and nearly ran into the back of a municipal bus.  She stopped so suddenly that we were all in danger of becoming furry projectiles. It was only my quick thinking and shout of ‘brace yourselves’ that avoided this.  I have noticed that her abilities to carry out several other tasks whilst driving have diminished since we have left Joeys.

Supper beckons, goodnight all…….

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